Sing I May Not


Poppy SurpriseSquirrelIfyouonlysee

Hey hey hey!!!  I know I am on the bad list of bloggers…I promise to write and draw more!

So today I have decided to share my FAV-or-IT song.  I would definitely agree that someone has heard the song but I listen to just four songs on this favorite album of mine named Tonic Lemon Parade.  I have zero clue as to what other albums Tonic has, who they really are and the background story of how they got discovered.

Any who…I really think this song really gets to me because I have always had a boyfriend in long term relationships and it is hard to explain why they would stay with such a crazy girl like me.  It almost feels like the loves of my life can’t put it down in words/emotions/feelings to discuss “why” they love me.

In my memory, I can only state one person that can look me in the eyes every day and say “I love you”.  Not forced.  Not co-dependent.  Not a long paragraph of what good qualities I have.  Not ending with a question mark.  Just soul to soul yo.

It seems extremely difficult to just stop loving someone that you aren’t together with anymore.  Just the huge memory file I store and refuse to even give my time to the negative blocks that really stabbed my heart.  I have this absolutely amazing quality to be angry for like three hours, fall asleep and then totally be fine and happy again.  It very much confuses other people.  Even twenty years ago, I remember doing that to the “haters” I had in high school.  I just wanted to be killing them with kindness and watch how they react the more I get to know my enemy.

A very very close friend of mine sat me down one day and wrote out this diagram about people in my life.  Out of 100 people, only 50 will like you and 50 will NOT like you.  Of the 50 that like you, 25 will like you no matter what and the 50 that do not like me, 25 will actually hate you.  Hmmm.  Think that over.  Spend time with the top 25 baby.

Happy Holidays for real!!  Tah tah.  Please share your favorite song!!

If you could only see the way she loves me Then maybe you would understand Why I feel this way about our love And what I must do If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says When she says she loves me Well you got your reasons And you got your lies And you got your manipulations They cut me down to size Sayin’ you love but you don’t You give your love but you won’t If you could only see the way she loves me Then maybe you would understand Why I feel this way about our love And what I must do If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says When she says she loves me Seems the road less traveled Show’s happiness unraveled And you got to take a little dirt To keep what you love That’s what you gotta do Sayin’ you love but you don’t You give your love but you won’t You’re stretching out your arms to something that’s just not there Sayin’ you love where you stand Give your heart when you can If you could only see the way she loves me Then maybe you would understand Why I feel this way about our love And what I must do If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says When she says she loves me Sayin’ you love but you don’t You give your love but you won’t Sayin’ you love where you stand Give your heart when you can If you could only see the way she loves me Then maybe you would understand Why I feel this way about or love And what I must do If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says When she says she loves me

Published by heatherdeogracia

On the first day of my job, I walk into a production studio to hand in paperwork. A young gentleman stands up to shake my hand when I walk into the room. "Wow! You are tall." he states. I point to my heels of my shoes. "Wow! You are short." Laughter lights up the room. Matt Damon San Francisco Clear Channel Radio With an electric soul of an artist, Heather Deogracia, has an interesting personality that uses her manic branches of her mind to express her sense of humor, expand the creative hourly illustration addiction and continually read big books about artistic principles, elements and glorious techniques to feed her intellectual capabilities. “With a splash of color and chemicals in my brain, I have to clean it out once a day or it must flash flood my other organs.” Heather Deogracia Proud to start staging a background of her latest achievements, Heather was on the front page Sunday Feature in the Midland Daily News on Oct. 19, 2016 and is an Award-Winning Fine Artist for the state-wide competition Legacy Trust Award Collection for the past three years in a row. She displayed in over 30 exhibits and fundraisers in the tri-city area over the past four years. She has earned a 2017 Leadership of Bay County Achievement Award from Studio 23 and a Midland County Art Letourneau Award for "Collaboration and Creativity in Community Support". A harshly educated woman, Deogracia spent five years to earn a double major Bachelor’s Degree of Science in Medical Illustration in Pre-Medicine and Fine Art at California State University in San Bernardino. At the same time period, she held down three jobs as an Intern for the District Attorney, Graphics Editor for the college weekly newspaper and created the Peer Health Education program. Her artistic talents covered in the fine studio art requirements included painting, color theory, graphic design, photography, figure drawing, advanced drawing, watercolor, sculpture, illustration and art portfolio assignments to keep work organized. In the sciences, she has a background in chemistry, organic chemistry, biochemistry, advanced human anatomy and psychology, biology, genetics, comparative animal psychology, marine biology and medical microbiology. Currently, she has been an art instructor for workshops for the past year for Creative 360, teaching private art lessons and writing a graphic novel soon to complete by the beginning of 2018 named Heather Hurts Inside: Illustrations of a Broken Human. The new true story is about a suicidal bipolar woman that is prescribed Ritalin at the age of 38 and she reverts back to her glory days of her life. The truth is that no one knows the past is killing her mind.